I am horribly depressed, as yesterday the stock market dropped faster than Bill Clinton's pants at a beauty pageant. In just a few hours, millions of American's retirement accounts were crippled by this collapse obviously caused by Bush's failed economic policies.
I have been analyzing market dynamics as they relate to these policies and will outline the cause and effect of same (market talk - for you who have little advanced economic and/or scientific training, you may want to stop reading here).
Cause and Effect of Bush Economic Policies by Scooter Van Neuter
- Bush stupidly lowers taxes.
- Our country receives in less money.
- Our country is forced to sell its stocks to pay its electric, water, gas, etc. bills.
- Due to this selling, the stock market tanks, wiping out average American's retirement savings.
- Not being able to retire, most people have little choice but to work for Halliburton and big oil companies for minimum wage, which makes Dick Cheney richer. Caring Democrats ease the suffering by raising minimum wage.
- Cheney gives substantial kickbacks to Bush for lowering taxes.
- Bush funnels kickback money to Saudis in return for them raising oil prices.
- Higher oil prices allow Bush to make even more money off of Iraqi oil he went to war to steal.
- Summation: Both Bush and Cheney are richer, you and I are poorer and ultimately forced to work for Cheney and his evil friends for peanuts.
Anyway, yesterday's market plunge really did some serious damage, and now I find myself worrying about my retirement. The good news is it could have been so much worse for me if I owned stocks - at least I'm not facing the prospect of being forced to work for that A-hole Cheney, thank God.
Scooter peace out.