World Waits For Obama To Address Gaza Situation

OAHU, HAWAII (SR) - The entire world is fixated on President-elect Obama, waiting for his inspired insight that will no doubt bring Israeli hostilities to an end and usher in an era of Middle East peace and cooperation.

Armies of reporters followed the strapping President-to-be around an exclusive Hawaiian golf course as he played a round, hoping to hear the words that will resolve the conflict in Gaza that threatens to inflame the whole region.

A Hamas liaison at the golf course told Scooter's Report: "We can't wait much longer, the Jews are blowing up all our stuff, and Iran isn't doing dick to help us - Obama must speak soon."

At one point the President-elect yelled for a Secret Service agent to get him "a hot dog and a beer," prompting a stampede of reporters to their up-link news vans in the club parking lot. Said one sobbing AP newswoman, "Finally, the words that will unite us all."

 

   President-elect Obama golfing in Hawaii