Camp Casey II

August 18, 2006

Crawford, Texas

I received an invitation to join Our Suffering Mother Of Perpetual Peace And Publicity Sheehan (OSMOPPAPS) at the new Camp Casey down in Crawford, Texas. Apparently Cindy purchased some acreage not far from Chimpy McHitler's ranch and she was anxious for me to see it and join her reinvigorated peace vigil, so I hopped a plane for Texas.

In all truthfulness, I was slightly underwhelmed by the new spread. For one thing, it's not that close to McHitler's ranch. For another, it's pretty scrubby land, dotted with only a few crappy tents, several smelly Porta-Potties, and handful of protesters that appeared to have been left out in the sun since Woodstock. The PA system sucked, and the only music was supplied by a cheap boom box. What's worse, the only press on hand was a few kids from the local high school, and I suspect they were there just for the pot.

I hate to sound so critical, but what's the deal with our supporters? Is there some unwritten rule that only really ugly people can protest this war? I remember back during the Vietnam war protests how we were all so young and beautiful. Everywhere I looked at the camp I saw these same people with exactly the same hairstyles and clothes they had 35 years ago and I have to tell you, a fat 60-year-old balding guy with a stringy ponytail decked out in tie-dyed t-shirt, golf shorts, socks and sandals just doesn't look right. Add a fanny pack to that picture and it honestly makes me want to puke, I'm sorry.

Anyway, it was nice to see Peace Mother Sheehan (PMS) again and especially nice to see that her continuing liquids-only fast had apparently not taken too bad a toll on her health. In fact she not only looked extremely healthy, I think she had gained a few pounds since I last saw her. Weird. Later I saw her preparing her dinner and it all made sense. I don't think I've ever seen anyone puree an entire eight-pound Honey Baked Ham with Stove Top Dressing, candied yams, Jello salad, and carrot cake, but she did and then drank the whole thing. Yummy! The other day she was rushed to the emergency room, but it wasn't because of dehydration as the news reported, but because of an errant piece of lobster shell that got stuck in her throat while drinking her seafood dinner. Luckily, she was okay.

I was ready to leave after a few days as there really wasn't much going on. One can only do so much chanting, singing, playing dead, breast and genital exposing, drum beating, body painting, weeping, etc. for peace, and by Thursday I had reached my limit. Besides, the camp's herb was obviously locally-grown and tasted like a burning tennis shoe, and I would rather die from intestinal blockage than ever again step foot in one of those fetid Porta-Potties. Woodstock was like a stay at the Four Seasons compared to this dump.

While I appreciate all PMS has done to stop this war, I'm not coming back without a motor home.

Comments

[Adolph from Cuba]

WARNING: DUE TO SOME GRAPHIC CONTENT, READER'S DISCRETION IS ADVISED.

Hadn't you known the real reason Cindy was on puree was she had lost her prosthetic teeth while being at the Porta-Potty?
According to sources that prefer to remain unknown, she had a hard time trying to evacuate and when she tried a really hard push the next thing she knew was her teeth were floating on top of the excrement.
Since then she's living on puree until she can have another teeth done. Oh well. I feel so sorry for her.

P. Moonbeam: I think Cindy has her teeth but at this point I'm not so sure of her wits...

[1sttofight]

Tom is good. He was able to get every Barking Moonbat talking point into just one post.

P. Moonbeam: I can almost see the froth around his mouth as he angrily typed :)

[Tom Ritchford]

Wow, you people must be really really desperate if this is the best you can do.

Let's see... 3000 dead in the World Trade Center, Bin Laden never caught. New Orleans, destroyed and not fixed. The largest deficits in the history of any country in the world, ever. Over a hundred thousand dead and over a trillion dollars wasted on a pointless war that has made the United States far less safe. The indefinitely suspension of most of the Bill of Rights -- and the Treasury looted.

And this is the best you can come up with, mocking some poor woman who lost her son to your craziness? Pathetic.

Good luck, guys! The next two years are *really* gonna suck for you!

P. Moonbeam: Hi Tom, thank you for input. Unfortunately, you might be a little confused. I swear I didn't have anything to do with 9/11, Bin Laden, New Orleans, deficits, wars, whatever you think somebody did to the Bill Of Rights, or treasury looting.
Could you have me confused with another Peace Moonbeam?
If this other Peace Moonbeam really did these things, I hope you find her and bring her to justice.
Good luck!

[David Amulet]

Lobster shells are indeed a threat. Perhaps up there with grizzly bears. Somebody tell Stephen Colbert!!

-- david

[Rastaman]

Hi, got a great laugh out of that. "Sheehag"... LOL!
I used to be a hippie way back then and a peacefreak, of course, but I've been a warmonger ever since the viper called Islam reared up its poisonous head and started attacking us. Now I would dearly love to see us make Iran glow in the dark with a really long half-life.

Keep up the good work.

Rastaman
www.islamanazi.com

P. Moonbeam: Thanks Rastaman! I'm all for turning Iran into a nightlite for the Middle East.

[Dr. Phat Tony]

Don't let Mother Sheehans weight gain fool you. It's not actually weight gain it's that she hasn't had the media time to expell all the gas and now it's building up and making her look more pudgy than normal. Just get her a microphone and a camera to some national press and she'll deflate a little.

[Patty]

Oh my stars and brooms hon what an aweful time you must have had. It is so horrid when one has gotten used to the creature comforts and find such a distressful situation.
I was just asking my friend Patrick if you had to have special aroma thearopy to remove the horrible stench from your senses?
Oh dear you must never stray to these areas where the sun will bake you, like a microwave.
I am sure PETA will have a rally soon up North.

P.s. Hon everyone knows that the cops have been busting the mexican and taking it as fast as it comes across teh border. You must have had some ditch weed.

P. Moonbeam: Hi Patty! It was awful but I survived. Next time PMS needs some support at Camp Casey (II) I'm sending Scooter.
I'm of the opinion Cindy was keeping the good stuff for herself. She does things like that, you know.

[webloafer]

Every visit to your chronicles leaves me laughing. Great one this time, webloafer.

Oh by the way, I picked up a scruffy hitchhiker yesterday and gave him a ride south. He said his name was 'Scooter', but it didn't register at the time. I was southbound and could only give him a ride for two exits. Yes, I was going further south, but not with that smell in my trucks cab. I ordered him out of my truck at the Peculiar, Missouri offramp on US highway 71. He should be alright, there is a truckstop within walking distance of where I ordered him out of the truck.

At least you know he is southbound, maybe he'll get to Texas before you dart off on your next crusade for peace.

P. Moonbeam: Thanks for the heads-up, Webloafer.
This news can only mean Scooter is either (1.) out of money (2.) out of pot (3.) evicted (4.) a combination of the above.
I'm sorry about his poor personal hygiene, we've talked about this before but he just doesn't get it.

[jarhead john]

Sounds like her "fast" is working out great for her. Shame that her attention grabbing antics are not....

Good to see you back on the road Peace. I can't wait for your next adventure. Perhaps you can combine Scooter, fire, and large carnivorous animals next time!

P. Moonbeam: Thanks John. I do see wild animals, fire, gnawed appendages, and Scooter in the near future. Poor Scooter.

[Seaspook]

I'm really hurt you didn't stop by and pick me up on your way Peace. I live just North of Crawford. Of course I wasn't invited and normally would not go, but what the hell I've been to the Congo, a hippy farm couldn't be any worse.

P. Moonbeam: Seaspook, I didn't know you lived there! Next time I'm staying at your place, especially if you have a real bathroom.