Live Earth a Resounding Success!
Although few people actually watched the series of concerts staged on seven continents, temperatures dramatically dropped across the globe during the all-day events. Al Gore, renowned climatologist, reported, "Madonna's set had the largest effect on the climate, as released skank particulates tend to shield some of the sun's harmful rays. During her last song it snowed." The father of hybrid car racer Al Gore III went on to say, "With a thousand Madonnas we could save the planet." We can only dream....
Cindy Sheehan Threatens to Challenge Pelosi
Antiwar activist Cindy Sheehan has given Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif) two weeks to enact legislation calling for President Bush's impeachment, or face her in the 2008 elections. Pelosi fired back, "While I admire Cindy's hatred of this country and it's military, and her shameless self-promotion built upon the bones of her dead son, I doubt voters are ready for a retarded horse-faced mutant in Congress." A chief Democrat political strategist downplayed Sheehan's threat by saying, "It wouldn't matter, most voters think Sheehan and Pelosi are the same person anyway." Alright, cat fight!!
Scooter peace out.
