In The Drink With "Ed"

August 23, 2005

Report From Camp Casey

Well I just returned form Camp Casey and all I can say is WOW, I have never seen so many famous people and celebrities!

The morning started with the return of Peace Mother Sheehan (PMS). Someone said her driver was Senator Ted Kennedy! I had a chance to speak with him briefly but when I asked if he was who I thought he was, he said no, his name was ”Ed”. I realized he couldn’t be Senator Kennedy as he smelled of gin and I don’t think senators drink.

Anyway, we fired up a doobie and gathered around Our Precious Mother Of Peace Sheehan (OPMOPS) and listened intently as she explained how the Jews had coerced that moron Bush into attacking the hapless Muslims to take their oil for Halliburton. Scary stuff to be sure!

Later, between interviews and filming for her new sitcom “Jihad Mom” Cindy joined us in mystic chants for peace and some really good hash. We held hands and wept, but I can’t remember why.

The camp is a beehive of activity. Greenpeace, Planned Parenthood, the ACLU, CAIR (Council On American-Islamic Relations), PETA, and many other organizations are here in support of our troops and against the evil regime that is the USA.

Across the road are the usual right-wing whack jobs including a bunch of Christians shuffling around on their knees “praying for us”. Right. Fortunately they weren’t around long as one of their group carrying a little child in a waist sling wandered too close to the Planned Parenthood group and was set upon by a guy with a pair of scissors who was trying to stab the baby in the back of the head. It was all a big misunderstanding as the guy thought the woman had partially given birth and he was trying to “help her do the right thing”. Oops, his bad!!

We decided to hold our own religious ceremony but ran short of crystals so we did some bong hits instead while chanting.

Well, finally Cindy had to go to her afternoon shooting of “Larry King Live” and later to her appearance on Air America so we bid her a tearful goodbye as she left with “Ed”.

What happened next was a little strange: Ed took the turn way too fast and slid the car into the drainage ditch. The second the car hit the water he jumped out like his pants were on fire and ran for town. Thank God the water was only a foot deep, no harm was done.

More later.

Moon Beam