September 29, 2006
New York City, New York
I came to the Big Apple this week to protest against that neocon bastion of right wing propaganda, Fox News. It's one thing for this network to be the mouthpiece of the G. W. Chimpy McHitler administration, but when they dare ambush the greatest and most beloved president this country has ever known, it's go time, baby. My friend Squid and I were prepared to stand with William Jefferson Clinton in the face of this attack and our presence in front of the Fox studios shouted to the world that we were ready to rumble.
In case you were in a cave and didn't hear what happened, Chris Wallace interviewed Clinton on Fox News Sunday. Supposedly this interview was to be partly about Clinton's Global Initiative campaign but before Bill could even get his bearings, Wallace ambushed him with a question about why he didn't grab Osama Bin Laden when given the chance a couple times. What followed was a forceful, impassioned, finger-pointing vintage WJC rebuttal, the likes of which we have not seen since he was asked whether he'd had "relations" with that lying tramp, Monica Lewinsky. In short, he made mincemeat out of Wallace.
It's not a big news flash that Clinton passed on grabbing Osama, we all understand that and frankly don't really care. The problem is the extreme hypocrisy of the right-wingers, like when they fault Clinton for not returning a call requesting approval to snatch Bin Laden until after the President finished his round of golf. The conservatives claim to enjoy and respect the game of golf but when it's WJC playing, they expect him to break all rules of protocol by making a noisy phone call while on the course in the company of his fellow players, something they would never consider. Typical double standard.
We've lived for years with these irrational attacks on the character of Bill Clinton from conservatives. The simple fact is any red-blooded American male would gladly play "hide the pickle" with a chubby, big-breasted Jewish girl, or enjoy an undisturbed game of golf on one of our nation's beautiful golf courses. For the conservatives to claim they wouldn't do the same is dishonest and hypocritical, and we're not going to let them get away with it any longer.
After standing outside the Fox studios for a couple hours, Squid and I were confident we had accomplished our goal of shaming the network, so we went to a Yankee game. Mr. Clinton, we, and just about every college professor in this country, stand with you sir.
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